i already hear my dad disowning me
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
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