he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize