.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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