he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
