I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize