So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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