You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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