Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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