I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
