Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize