Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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