One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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