Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i wish my penis had a tongue
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
