I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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