I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize