i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
