The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
