I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
