it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
