i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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