So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
