Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
