So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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