we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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