STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
