They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
