I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'm passing your future prison.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
