i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
