I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
