So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize