U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize