with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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