Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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