Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize