i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
