somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
