med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Never joke about your clitoris.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
