Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize