Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
The uberlube is also flammable
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
