if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
That reminds me...we need to get swords
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
