I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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