I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I could have mohawked her pubes.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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