no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize