They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize
