she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
