I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
