margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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