Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Randomize
