i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize