Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
